Does fear hold you back? Are there things you’d like to do – but don’t – because you are gripped by fear?
We all experience fear. It’s part of how we made the world.
No one who follows the ego’s teaching is without fear. (T-15.I.4)
Whenever we choose the wrong-minded thought system of the ego as our guide, we will experience fear – and all its little cousins of doubt, insecurity, and anxiety.
But it need not be.
Fear is not of the present, but only of the past and future, which do not exist. There is no fear in the present when each instant stands clear and separate from the past, without its shadow reaching out into the future. (T-15.I.8)
Recall the opening lines of A Course in Miracles:
The opposite of love is fear, but what is all-encompassing can have no opposite. This course can therefore be summed up very simply in this way: Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God. (T-in.1-2)
When we chose to “dedicate” parts of our life to fear, we are choosing the opposite of love. But as we read in Chapter 28 (The Undoing of Fear), we learn that fear is simply a choice. Not an objective reality that impinges upon us – but rather, a mistaken choice. And we are offered another option, a thought system completely counter to fear. A mindset that undoes all the terrifying debilitations of fear.
Once we make that different choice, we see our daily narratives of fear replaced with blissfully calm chronicles of love. No longer are we paralyzed in the grip of fear, no longer do we pace in anxious paranoia. Instead, we walk in wondrous tranquility with a relaxed smile – at peace in all our everyday encounters.
So, the next time you feel the fear begin to grip, remember it’s a choice – and then, choose again.
I think fear is connected to my crying out for love, when I am not extending love. the clinging, the lack of belief that all is well, now and forever, the scratching for security through things here – people loving me, safety, health. In those moments of letting go , trusting, knowing that nothing real can be threatened, love can not be erased, are moments of peace – big sighs, big deep breaths. Those are moments that I am able to extend love. To lean into that trust and assurance, I plan to meditate more – a place of peaceful remembering. I hope that what I will release, what is holding me back, will allow me to be my authentic self, not the self that twists and turns for approval, for the image of love, to satiate the ego’s need for a pat on the head, a good girl.
Thank you for this note…I plan to journal more and read, again for the first time, chapter 28. Thank you!!
Thank you for the sincere comments. I think we can all relate to what you wrote. Indeed the whole purpose of the ego thought system is to not only convince us this is real and capable of serious consequences – but also that our “happiness” is found outside of ourselves (such as our craving the approval, attention, and affection of other people). These beliefs stem from the original mistaken thought of separation, the “tiny, mad idea at which the Son of God remembered not to laugh”.
Chapter 28 is very powerful indeed. Also, here’s a gentle reminder from Chapter 18 that is quite lovely and reassuring: “When you seem to see some twisted form of the original error rising to frighten you, say only, ‘God is not fear, but Love,’ and it will disappear.” (T-18.I.7)
Here is an example of a dedication to fear I recently discovered in myself. I was playing a sport called pickleball the other day. It’s the fastest growing sport in the country- kind of like mini tennis. I was always known as a talented athlete, but was never able to ever feel like my best self when competing. Nerves would almost always get the best of me, so I would never reach my potential. It was frustrating! I realized a few days ago that it was my ego getting in the way. I am more worried about and committed to the idea of being a good player and judging myself than I am to just playing the game and enjoying myself in the moment. For the rest of the match, every time I would feel nervous, I realized my ego was getting in my way, and I thought about love instead and how that was what was important. This refocusing gave me an immediate release from my ego, my muscles started to relax and I began to have a really great time, and actually play well consistently. When i did make an error, i didn’t allow myself to feel embarrassed. Ironically my playing well happened as a result of thinking of love instead of worrying about whether I was going to play well. I shake my head in amazement when I realize the simple truth of love’s path I saw in those moments on the court.